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trust me
here for a reason. 
12th-Mar-2008 09:40 pm
GL - Nia - I want to see the world anew
Dear World,

Though it's hard sometimes, I love my job. I love that I can do what I can do, and I love that I'm learning more so I can do more. I love that sometimes in the middle of what I'm doing I think, Yes, this is where I'm supposed to be, and there are those priceless moments in which I think,
I am here in this world for a reason, and this is my reason.

And hey, I get that not everybody loves this job, and I sure get that a whole lot of people don't love the people who do this job. I get that from my own family often enough, from the relatives who tell me, Go corporate, that's where the money is, from my brother, whom I love dearly, but who thinks lawyers are scum and won't hold back that opinion even from me, from my uncle, who backed away when he heard that I'd be qualifying soon - and even though some of it is in jest, I can't say I'm completely unaffected.

But it's not going to stop me.

I get that most people's experience with lawyers haven't generally been the sort that leave favourable impressions. Hey, I get that most people's experience with lawyers are pretty darn godawful never-to-be-repeated I'll-never-touch-a-lawyer-with-a-ten-foot-pole experiences.

My first experience with the legal profession was an experience like that, after all.

It left such a deep impression on me that it was the biggest unspoken reason I became a lawyer. It's the one I rarely ever talk about. But I know how awful it is to be on the other end of a nasty situation (and I'm not even going to say nasty lawyer, because the situation is sometimes bad enough that whether the lawyer's good or bad makes no difference).

And I'll never forget what it feels like. There's so much fear, anger, and frustration when you or someone you know is on the recieving end of the law or a nasty lawyer. But it doesn't take away the good that lawyers can do, and are doing, in the world. We're not perfect. Nobody is. There sure are a lot of lawyers out there who could be doing a lot better. There sure are a lot of lawyers out there who shouldn't be lawyers at all. But there are lawyers out there who are making life easier for their clients and for the people who can't afford lawyers, by volunteering and just doing their best. And I think that that shouldn't be forgotten.

I've always thought that the problem with the world was that you never heard enough about the lawyers who were doing good in the world. Most of what everybody hears and remembers are, Guess which lawyer ran off with what spectacular sum of money? Guess what they're suing for? Guess who's helping them sue for it?

You want jokes about why hell's got all the lawyers? I've heard all of them.

And I know I'm going to develop a much more robust attitude towards this, but I'm still new to this, and every time I hear of someone who's had a bad experience with a lawyer, however near or far away to my life it is, I can't help but think I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that that happened to you. And I wish you'd met someone else who could've showed you that lawyers aren't all like that, and that it doesn't have to be that way. Just like the way I'm disgusted for hours and outraged on some indefinable level for longer than I should be whenever I read about a misbehaving lawyer in the papers, as I think, This is why people hate us!

But, you know what? There are good people in this profession, too. People who don't forget that it isn't all about the money. There are so many ways in this profession to make a good difference in this world. Sure, we have our share of total bastards. But so does every profession. We have people who make lawyers ashamed to be lawyers.

But we're not all like that.

You can be a lawyer and a good person. I've met people like that: lawyers who are kind, gentle, and completely wonderful people, people who made me think, I want to grow up to be like you. Lawyers who are kind to those whom they work with and to those who they're up against. Lawyers who have shown me that even in the most heated legal battles that there is room for courtesy, and there is room to respect everyone you're dealing with.

And God help me, I'm going to grow up to be like that.
And I'm going to do everything I can to not become the sort of lawyer I'd be ashamed of sharing a profession with.
Comments 
12th-Mar-2008 02:53 pm (UTC)
You go change the world, Aedoll.

Hey, both my parents were lawyers, and they're two of the most moral people I know. My dad quit the profession because of his frustration with the other people in it - namely, that the better lawyers were often paid much less and made to give in to ones that deserved the position less. But the profession needs good people. Don't let what people say hurt you. Just know that you're going to do your best to help people, and the ones that take advantage of people are not your fault.

I usually hear people say that they're going to be lawyers for the money. It's nice to hear someone doing it for another reason.
12th-Mar-2008 03:15 pm (UTC)
Because you're special, and ilu. ♥

12th-Mar-2008 03:22 pm (UTC) -
*and loves you*

Thank you so much, sweetheart.

I hurt to hear about your Dad's experience even as I know that that's the sort of thing that happens all too often in this profession, and I'm happy that he's happier where he is now.

I try my best not to let what other people say affect what I do. But I must admit that whenever I have an experience like that it's like a brief squall breaking out over a calm ocean. I'll get better at shielding as I get older, I do think.

*smiles* I thought that your parents were good people because they raised someone like you. ♥

*grin!* The scary thing is I sometimes thinkt here's nothing else I can think of that I want to do! (Even as I sometimes think OH GOD THEY CAN'T EVER PAY ME ENOUGH FOR THIS, at work)

I wish people would understand it's not about the money. Some of the people I know, for example. "But [insert other profession/field of law] pays more" doesn't really work on someone who... really can't conceive of doing anything else.
12th-Mar-2008 03:39 pm (UTC) - Re: ♥
I try my best not to let what other people say affect what I do. But I must admit that whenever I have an experience like that it's like a brief squall breaking out over a calm ocean. I'll get better at shielding as I get older, I do think.

I think it might be a little bit like how I get over people going "OMG YOU WORK AT A ZOO THAT MEANS YOU SUPPORT THE OPPRESSION OF ANIMALS!" Which never ceases to make me furious, even though I know they can only say that if they're ignorant and that I can only make it better by showing otherwise through my work. Okay, so maybe that wasn't a good comparison. But still.

I understand, hon. My career choice will leave me with little money indeed, which my parents have pointed out, but it's totally not about the money for me. It's what I have to do. I feel like I was made for it. The same you seem to have been made for this.
22nd-Mar-2008 03:44 pm (UTC) - (thank you for this)
Thank you so much for writing this, sweetheart. I'm so sorry to have taken so long to get back to this, but reading this made me really happy to know that you're doing what you were made for, and knowing that you see the same thing in me makes me feel even more that I'm doing the right thing. ♥

So many people are so very much about the money - it's a good thing that there are people like you in the world. ♥

The oppression of animals idea makes me deeply annoyed, too, and I know you'd feel it even more intensely. And I believe that you are already making it better through the people you know and the people who know you. The best way we have to change the way people think is by being that change. Just by being here and by talking about what you love and feel deeply about, you can and are changing the way people think. It is a good comparison, and I am with you 100% on what you want to accomplish. ♥
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